Donald Trump was recently on the Rachael Ray show. They were playing a game where he had to guess what a bunch of strange objects were.
When he got to this one:
they both erupted in giggles. They kept saying, "You know what it reminds me of...one of 'those..." But they just weren't adult enough to say the word vibrator.
On Judge Mathis (what do you want, I was eating lunch) he keep harassing a defendant about a certain spa party she went to. He would not leave her alone. He kept saying, "Was it one of those parties?" But he would not say the word vibrator.
And finally, the promo they have been playing for The New Adventures of Old Christine has Julia Louis-Dreyfus saying, "Guess who I'm going home with?"
Her ex-husband says, "That thing in your underwear drawer?"
Her brother says, "That thing in your nightstand?" But no one will say vibrator.
So I will. VIBRATOR.
You know what, I'm gonna start answering the phone that way.
Yeah, the next time the phone rings, I'm going to say, "Vibrator!"
That ought to get me on the Do Not Call List pretty fast.
Update: I just remembered that when we were younger, my brother and I would call each other, dildo and douchebag. And not in a loving way. My mom put a stop to it the day she explained what each thing meant.
27 comments:
Vibrator vibrator VIBRATOR!!!
Some people are odd. I bet they don't say sex or vagina either.
VIBRATOR! There. I said it.
Go Patriots! random thought :) Too bad I don't have your number - nor does David. We are almost calling 411 to call you so I can see if you will answer Vibrator.
veronica: Yay! I can hear you all the way from Australia!
jenn: I'm much too busy crying over the patriots to answer the phone :(
LOL! Do us a favor, record those phone conversations where you answer the phone,"vibrator!" and post them for us. I'm dying to hear that.
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that is IT. you are on my do not call list.
except i have set my phone so that when *you* ring, it vibrates.
it never vibrates.
wait, maybe i should actually put my *husband's* number on the vibrate list. yes, that makes more sense.
and one of my boyfriends. the cute one.
I sort of miss my vibrator. And there is NOTHING wrong with saying VIBRATOR!!
Dildo maybe, but not vibrator.
It's just an indication of the rightward swing the US has taken for the past 8 or so years. Not that I'm implying anything political...
Ok, I am, but I'm amongst friends right? Or at least out of the country so no one reading this can hurt me.
But they could send me a new vibrator....if they were in a giving mood.
vibrator.
I bet they also won't say "phallus shaped device that people derive sexual pleasure from"
Vibrator.
I love when people call them a "personal massager".
Vibrator. VIBRATOR.
Vibrator.
groovy: First, the phone needs to actually ring.
plays: This is your 3 blog!! How can you possibly write 3 blogs?
holly: YES! Oh, wait. You were joking. Damn it.
lilac: Surely those Belgians can make a decent vibrator.
cami: Nope, they didn't. They all just giggled.
Hmmm. Why can't I see the picture of the thing that might be a vibrator. Were you afraid to post it or has Google censored it?
funnily enough, my physical therapist gave me a "mini vibrator" this week to massage the scar tissue on my hand. With 3 different heads, no less. MM and I had some fun discussing THAT.
And both of our phones are set to vibrate!
Vibrator.... LOL how about the "shower massager"?
I also love to throw people off guard with the word vagina... "My vagina hates me today".... lol
Ahhh Miss Burrows. Brings back so many memories. Sighhh.
When I was younger my surname was Dillon, so I was often referred to as Dildo.
Will you shout pubes down the phone too? So many people have problems with that word too. Pubes, pubes, pubes.
Oh, and,
Vibrrrrrrrrratorrrrrrrrrr.
tillerman: I think the site is down. Sorry. It such a fantastic picture too. ;P
mielikki: Well, if the doctor says you need to....you must comply.
talina: Wait did you do to make your vagina hate you? Yikes!
jo: Um, no...but you are more than welcome to do so.
jo: thaaaaaannnkkkkk youuuuuuuu
I swear I posted here last night. Where is it?!
Grrrrrrr....
Yeay! Finally...someone breaking down the barriers on the word VIBRATOR!
sybil: I don't know. Hey, why are you always laughing at me??
meleah: Yay! Although no one here seems to have a problem with it. I wonder what the lurkers are thinking.
Ooh, I'm slow getting to the party-
In normal discourse, I, of course, never pass up the opportunity to say "vibrator." In print, as often as it comes up, I generally go for discretion. Which probably means that if I did a search in my gmail account for "schmibrator" the results may be several pages long-all emails to and from Saucygrrl, who taught me the term.
Incidentally, Google is more uptight than I am; when I search for my name and Schmibrator it offers up "Did you mean: manchurian candidate schmissrauter"
I'll have to break it to saucy; schmissrauter may well become my favorite euphemism.
menchuvian: Yes, my dear, you are late. All the batteries have been given out. Sorry. But you can always swing by Star Market and get some more.
I will sometimes jokingly call them "BOB" or Battery Operated Boyfriend. That fist one looks a little aggressive...
You can kill two birds with one stone by saying "my vibrator is for my vagina". That will get 'em nervous.
-Stu
stu: Yes, but not all vibrators are for vaginas.
Miss B,
Very true. I was thinking that would be more of a second date discussion ;)
-Stu
I totally forgot why I came here.
For open minded there's no proble, like us. But for people who are not open about this sex gadget, they think this immorality. Good post!
Vibrating Toys
I find it weird why other people cant say the word vibrator? For me I find the word just like a toys. Vibrators is a gadget to add pleasure in your sex life. Why bother not saying the word Vibrator.
There's nothing wrong with that. It's just that maybe they trying to be safe,maybe "PG issues"! Anyways, can i call you i love to hear your voice saying the mighty word "vibrator"!
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