Listen to the supermarket checker.

As you may or may not know (pay attention!) I lived on the East Coast most of my life. There, when you go to the supermarket, you get your groceries, bring them to the checker, pay and leave. There is no chit-chat, like there is here on the West Coast. No one tells you about how they just caught their husband cheating on them and how they fixed him good by putting sugar in his gas tank...but I digress.

Normally, I just nod and smile and try not to get sucked in to "supermarket small talk". But the other day, I learned my lesson.

Jose was busily scanning all my food. When he got to the package of chicken breasts (that I had dutifully packaged in an extra plastic bag), he said. "Whooaa!! Did you smell these?"

To which I said, "what the hell are you talking about?" "why no, I don't believe that I did."

"They smell gross, said Jose, "here, smell!"

I waved the chicken breasts away and said, "No, thanks. I believe you."

He placed the offending food to the side and called for someone to bring me some more.

He went back to scanning my food and putting it in shopping bags.

When he was all done, the other guy still hadn't come to the register, so Jose said, "Well, I guess we'll just have to wait for your breasts."

To which I am pretty sure I made this face:




Jose starting apologizing, and I said, "No worries, breasts are always worth waiting for."